Summer 1990

When I was a teenager, I had a terrible car wreck. I felt so guilty about the circumstances, and the consequences to other people from my actions, that I didn’t tell the whole truth leading to a lot of feelings of shame and guilt.

How could they ever forgive me?

I apologized to the one most injured and her parents at the time, but I did not confess the whole story.  Fast forward to 2 ½ years after learning of Celebrate Recovery and I had the opportunity to speak to each member of her family and apologize again, but this time I told them the truth of what had happened that night.  They were so full of grace.  Every one of them chose to forgive me.  Her brother even told me that their family grew closer through that season and that the wreck in no way was all negative for their family.  I don’t know all the positives, I would never have asked, but they all forgave me.  As for my friend, she just wanted to be sure that I was getting help and ask that I continue to seek that help until I no longer struggle with the choices I made that night. 

Celebrate Recovery started out as a triage for my sin and has grown into a desire to grow spiritually.   In Philippians 1:9, Paul writes that he is praying for the people of Philippi that their love would abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight.  There is a fellowship here at Celebrate Recovery.  People show up.  We can share our problems so others can come along and build us up.  The people of CR do life together.  I am a work in progress.  I’ve been very slow to get in the game.  I’m starting to understand it more.  My desire to increase the time I spend with God is changing me.  Before CR, I never, never, never considered being honest about that night.  Why would I tell anyone the truth behind my devastating choices?  I did that because principle 6 tells me to make amends for the harm I have done to others (Matthew 5:7-9).  I had already been forgiven, but what good is asking for forgiveness if the whole truth isn’t out there?  My friend’s entire family knows the truth now.  I am so grateful to my sponsor, therapist, accountability partners and YOU.  The people who are there every Friday night, so that I can continue to learn that we are all hurting, but there are more perspectives and lots of growth and all I have to do is come back and be willing.

I am thankful for all I’ve learned since that difficult summer of 1990 to now, the summer of 2012... God is good!

Grateful Believer,
Jennifer