Summer Furlough

{Jamie is a former CR participant at MRCC, and is now a missionary that lives in Rwanda.}

              After living in Rwanda for one year, I was writing on my personal blog about what it is like coming "home" to a familiar place, but not quite feeling like I fit. There are many new pop culture things, advances in technology and new songs on the radio that remind me that Kigali isn't really home and Oklahoma City isn't really home either. "This world is not my home."

I was surprised to hear two new Christian songs talking specifically about forgiveness. It reminded me of step 9, "We made direct amends to such people whenever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."

One song says, "Lord, it doesn't feel right for me to turn a blind eye. But I guess it's not that much when I think of what You have done...Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them Cause I feel like I'm the one losing." (Losing by Tenth Avenue North)

The second song says, "It’ll clear the bitterness away, It can even set a prisoner free, There is no end to what it’s power can do. So, let it go and be amazed. By what you see through eyes of grace. The prisoner that it really frees is you." (Forgiveness by Matthew West)

(I love that the steps are so integrated into my everyday thinking.)

But honestly, reflect on the words of those songs. I live in a country who went through a massive genocide and 18 years later they are focused on forgiveness and can work side by side. My friend has started a fish farm in the community that her family was killed in. I was out with her one day watching the workers move huge rocks from one place to the other and she shared, "some of these people were killers. Some of these people killed my family." I asked her how she does it, how can one come to that level of forgiveness to employ people who have killed another human and some who were her family. She looked me in the eye and said, "It is only by the grace of God. I have to forgive them, because if I can't then God can't forgive me."

I don't want to be a prisoner trapped in my own un-forgiveness. I want the freedom in Christ Jesus that He offers to anyone who comes.

Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift. Matthew 5:23-24

Umwizera ishimwe,  (Grateful Believer)

Jamie